I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize