with your own penis?
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Panties = found
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
