Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
