shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Randomize
