hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Randomize
