I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize
