I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
