My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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