im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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