I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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