At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Randomize
