Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Randomize
