There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Are my feet made of real feet?
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Randomize
