whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Randomize
