batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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