No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
