Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
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