Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize
