You're my little dorito
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Randomize
