Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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