dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
