lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
