btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
i wish my penis had a tongue
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
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