So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
