im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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