Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
how does that bad decision feel?
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
