i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
