There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I have already put on my inside pants.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
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