I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
