Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
did you just send me my own nude
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
