Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
