with your own penis?
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize
