My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
