OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I've blown a few things in my day
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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