I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Randomize
