im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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