How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
