Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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