areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Randomize
