maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
