i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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