no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
splinters make it hard to masturbate
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
