I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
