This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize
