i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize