he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
