Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
