But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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