whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
