My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize